bird of passage
decoding myself
Thursday, February 04, 2010
Queen Bandit - February 14 2006 - February 3 2010
Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation. ~ Khalil Gibran
In loving memory of our Bandit who we love so much. Bandit will be greatly missed and be in our hearts forever.
You greet me in the morning before I leave for work and you greet me again when I come back home. Now I will miss all the meetings we have. I was amazed by your intelligence, I was inspired by your bravery but now I am in the depths of despair by your loss.
Fuzzy is still looking for you. He has not realized that you are gone. He keeps looking at the last place he saw you covered with blood. We all cannot forget that night. The night when He decided you bring you back.
You have left us too soon. From Him you came, to Him you’ve returned. We hope one day we will all be united in His garden.
Labels: self
Friday, October 12, 2007
Words
In her words
I can't fight that!
You are probably the better person,
but he is probably my best friend and soulmate
I can't fight that!
Labels: self
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Elvis has left the building
I think I am losing a friend
It's my fault, I've been an idiot
I guess we'll never talk after this
We're probably never even friends
But I want you to know I'll be there
Through the thick and thin
I wish things did not go this way
I like the way things used to be
Even though we'll never talk again
Or just hang around
I just want you to know
I'll always be here to pick you up when you're down
Even though we're no longer friends
You can always come to me
I have a shoulder you can cry on,
A soul on which you can lean on
Remember me next time you cry
I'm here
To be with you
It's my fault, I've been an idiot
I guess we'll never talk after this
We're probably never even friends
But I want you to know I'll be there
Through the thick and thin
I wish things did not go this way
I like the way things used to be
Even though we'll never talk again
Or just hang around
I just want you to know
I'll always be here to pick you up when you're down
Even though we're no longer friends
You can always come to me
I have a shoulder you can cry on,
A soul on which you can lean on
Remember me next time you cry
I'm here
To be with you
Labels: self
Tea for two
It hurts me now endlessly just to see you
I didn't realize just how much you made me burn
But it hurts me even more to see you with someone else
It hurts me endlessly too just the thought of not seeing you
I didn't realize just how much my heart aches within from missing you
But it hurts me even more to see you with someone else
Why do I worry so much about this one?
She made me feel again, something I lost long time ago
I'm with you in the shadows
Delighted to share tea for two
I didn't realize just how much you made me burn
But it hurts me even more to see you with someone else
It hurts me endlessly too just the thought of not seeing you
I didn't realize just how much my heart aches within from missing you
But it hurts me even more to see you with someone else
Why do I worry so much about this one?
She made me feel again, something I lost long time ago
I'm with you in the shadows
Delighted to share tea for two
Labels: self
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Sweet Vitriol
Life is funny sometimes
Boy meets Girl
Boy likes Girl
Girl maybe likes Boy too
But Girl is already in a relationship
And Girl wants to see Boy too
Boy is like "what the hell?"
One song in Boys mind, Ben Harper's Walk Away
Boy meets Girl
Boy likes Girl
Girl maybe likes Boy too
But Girl is already in a relationship
And Girl wants to see Boy too
Boy is like "what the hell?"
One song in Boys mind, Ben Harper's Walk Away
Labels: self
Sunday, September 30, 2007
She
She
Doesn’t always know
How much I see it’s in her eyes
She
Doesn’t always realize
How much it means to muse on her face
She
Doesn’t always know
How much she makes me crazy, in ways I never thought possible
Doesn’t always know
How much I see it’s in her eyes
She
Doesn’t always realize
How much it means to muse on her face
She
Doesn’t always know
How much she makes me crazy, in ways I never thought possible
Labels: self
Monday, September 24, 2007
Every little thing
I have this stupid crush for this girl. She is the infatuation of my life now, dazed or not. She makes me go wild by her slightest gestures. I am in this excruciating agony just because of her. It's so disruptive. I know it's a disaster to even think of following this path.
Three songs keep playing in my mind; The Police's Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic, George Harrison's Got My Mind Set on You and Elton John's I Want Love.
I seriously need to get her out of my system.
Labels: self
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Apparantly
Apparantly this is who I am:
INTPs are logical, individualistic, reserved, and very curious individuals. They focus on ideas, theories and the explanation of how things work. They are especially adept at discussions and debate. They have the ability to focus intently on a subject. They appreciate and respect intelligence in others.
"INTPs are relatively easy-going and amenable to most anything until their principles are violated, about which they may become outspoken and inflexible. They prefer to return, however, to a reserved albeit benign ambiance, not wishing to make spectacles of themselves."
- INTP Profile (TypeLogic)
"The INTP is above all a thinker and his inner (private) world is a place governed by a strong sense of logical structure. Every experience is to be rigorously analysed, the task of the INTP's mind is to fit each encountered idea or experience into a larger structure defined by logic."
- An INTP Profile (intp.org)
"INTPs live in the world of theoretical possibilities. They see everything in terms of how it could be improved, or what it could be turned into. They live primarily inside their own minds, having the ability to analyze difficult problems, identify patterns, and come up with logical explanations. They seek clarity in everything, and are therefore driven to build knowledge. They are the "absent-minded professors", who highly value intelligence and the ability to apply logic to theories to find solutions."
- Portrait of an INTP (The Personality Page)
"likes solitude, not revealing, unemotional, rule breaker, avoidant, familiar with the darkside, skeptical, acts without consulting others"
- Jung Type Descriptions (INTP) (similarminds.com)
OK, that's scary!
INTPs are logical, individualistic, reserved, and very curious individuals. They focus on ideas, theories and the explanation of how things work. They are especially adept at discussions and debate. They have the ability to focus intently on a subject. They appreciate and respect intelligence in others.
"INTPs are relatively easy-going and amenable to most anything until their principles are violated, about which they may become outspoken and inflexible. They prefer to return, however, to a reserved albeit benign ambiance, not wishing to make spectacles of themselves."
- INTP Profile (TypeLogic)
"The INTP is above all a thinker and his inner (private) world is a place governed by a strong sense of logical structure. Every experience is to be rigorously analysed, the task of the INTP's mind is to fit each encountered idea or experience into a larger structure defined by logic."
- An INTP Profile (intp.org)
"INTPs live in the world of theoretical possibilities. They see everything in terms of how it could be improved, or what it could be turned into. They live primarily inside their own minds, having the ability to analyze difficult problems, identify patterns, and come up with logical explanations. They seek clarity in everything, and are therefore driven to build knowledge. They are the "absent-minded professors", who highly value intelligence and the ability to apply logic to theories to find solutions."
- Portrait of an INTP (The Personality Page)
"likes solitude, not revealing, unemotional, rule breaker, avoidant, familiar with the darkside, skeptical, acts without consulting others"
- Jung Type Descriptions (INTP) (similarminds.com)
OK, that's scary!
Labels: self
Sunday, June 19, 2005
About
My friends call me BJ but I was born named as Ajmal Khan. It’s supposed to mean the beautiful king, something really to ponder. I am not related to Shah Rukh Khan or any other Khans you see in Bollywood films. I am also not a descendent of Gengkhis Khan or Kublai Khan. Heck, no one in my family even has the word Khan in their name.
I started bird of passage hoping it will serve as a métier of self reflection for me and something for me to look back later in life.
I am working towards getting to do whatever I want in life. I am a software consultant (con + insult). I never studied anything related to IT or computer science, hence testifying my gypping skills. Nevertheless, I get the pleasure telling people that they are screwed up. I hope retiring to education & research by the age of 35 and to have my very own restaurant.
I am obsessed with music but I don’t put it on all the time. I don’t believe in imposing my music to others. It’s like religion; you respect mine, I respect yours. I am, however, very selective as to what music I am so passionate about. Am I a musical snob, like those listen to classical music and think everyone else is a twat. No, I don’t think so; I just appreciate good music. I listen to Hendrix, Dylan, Morrison, Queen, Beatles, The Who, Zeppelin and the list goes on. But I do appreciate new music but not those mainstream artistes like Britney or Backstreet Boys. I am also an avid fan of Jazz. The likes of Chet Baker, Etta James, Billie Holiday, Charlie Parker always brings the mood on. I am also interested in Cuban Jazz where the likes of Ibrahim Ferrer and Tito Puente always bring in the swing.
On top of listening, I actually do play some music. Not at a professional level but enough to amuse myself. I can play the guitar, the bass and the trumpet. Nowadays, I am venturing into percussions. Due to the demanding nature of my work, now I am reduced into a mere audience. Apart from that I am heavily indulged into performing arts, mainly theater and music. Forget dance, it’s a form of art that I will never get it. It’s just not in me.
Cooking serves as life’s little pleasure for me. I love cooking a feast for my friends and they love it too. Usually I will never serve anything less than a five course meal! I am quite an eccentric cook. I fret anyone who requests for Chili Sauce or Ketchup. I don’t believe in condiments that are not meant for the food. Cooking for me is also a form of art. I don’t usually remake what others have done. I prefer to create my masterpiece and I hate it when people ask me to redo what I did before. How would Michelangelo feel if you ask him to recreate David? And never ask for recipe from me; not that I don’t want to share, I just don’t have one. I cook by instinct. I think I am blowing my own trumpet, but hey, sometimes narcissism is necessary.
I try to make time for some reading usually fiction that involves character conflicts. Nowadays I am really interested in Asian authors as their story is closer to me personally. I’m also a big fan of Nick Hornby who I think sounds like me. I do like other authors but I’m more focused on the work rather than the author itself. Nick Hornby is an exception.
I love to travel and experience the foreign culture first hand but lately work has been killing and did not manage to get out. I really need to reconsider my priorities. I hate traveling on those fix packages. I’m more of a free and easy traveler. No specific plan, just go where the wind brings me. Planning a backpacking trip to Cambodia, but yet to materialize.
Finally, I am also a sports freak, both as a spectator and participator. Up for any game except sepak takraw. I just could not handle that game. I am also a fanatic Liverpool fan. Other than that I don’t exactly support anyone or any other teams.
I started bird of passage hoping it will serve as a métier of self reflection for me and something for me to look back later in life.
I am working towards getting to do whatever I want in life. I am a software consultant (con + insult). I never studied anything related to IT or computer science, hence testifying my gypping skills. Nevertheless, I get the pleasure telling people that they are screwed up. I hope retiring to education & research by the age of 35 and to have my very own restaurant.
I am obsessed with music but I don’t put it on all the time. I don’t believe in imposing my music to others. It’s like religion; you respect mine, I respect yours. I am, however, very selective as to what music I am so passionate about. Am I a musical snob, like those listen to classical music and think everyone else is a twat. No, I don’t think so; I just appreciate good music. I listen to Hendrix, Dylan, Morrison, Queen, Beatles, The Who, Zeppelin and the list goes on. But I do appreciate new music but not those mainstream artistes like Britney or Backstreet Boys. I am also an avid fan of Jazz. The likes of Chet Baker, Etta James, Billie Holiday, Charlie Parker always brings the mood on. I am also interested in Cuban Jazz where the likes of Ibrahim Ferrer and Tito Puente always bring in the swing.
On top of listening, I actually do play some music. Not at a professional level but enough to amuse myself. I can play the guitar, the bass and the trumpet. Nowadays, I am venturing into percussions. Due to the demanding nature of my work, now I am reduced into a mere audience. Apart from that I am heavily indulged into performing arts, mainly theater and music. Forget dance, it’s a form of art that I will never get it. It’s just not in me.
Cooking serves as life’s little pleasure for me. I love cooking a feast for my friends and they love it too. Usually I will never serve anything less than a five course meal! I am quite an eccentric cook. I fret anyone who requests for Chili Sauce or Ketchup. I don’t believe in condiments that are not meant for the food. Cooking for me is also a form of art. I don’t usually remake what others have done. I prefer to create my masterpiece and I hate it when people ask me to redo what I did before. How would Michelangelo feel if you ask him to recreate David? And never ask for recipe from me; not that I don’t want to share, I just don’t have one. I cook by instinct. I think I am blowing my own trumpet, but hey, sometimes narcissism is necessary.
I try to make time for some reading usually fiction that involves character conflicts. Nowadays I am really interested in Asian authors as their story is closer to me personally. I’m also a big fan of Nick Hornby who I think sounds like me. I do like other authors but I’m more focused on the work rather than the author itself. Nick Hornby is an exception.
I love to travel and experience the foreign culture first hand but lately work has been killing and did not manage to get out. I really need to reconsider my priorities. I hate traveling on those fix packages. I’m more of a free and easy traveler. No specific plan, just go where the wind brings me. Planning a backpacking trip to Cambodia, but yet to materialize.
Finally, I am also a sports freak, both as a spectator and participator. Up for any game except sepak takraw. I just could not handle that game. I am also a fanatic Liverpool fan. Other than that I don’t exactly support anyone or any other teams.
Labels: self
